The Dallas Stars Speak Now (Taylor’s Version) Superlatives

The free Agent frenzy has passed, and it feels like half the league has changed teams. In case you’ve forgotten who’s on the Dallas Stars, here’s a roster refresher. Since it’s the offseason and things are quiet, I had fun and assigned every player a lyric from the new Taylor Swift album Speak Now (Taylor’s Version) and explained why. So without further to do, here are the Speak Now (Taylor’s Version) Dallas Stars superlatives.

Dallas Stars Forwards

Jason Robertson: “And long, long live that look on your face” Long Live

Have you seen Robertson smile after scoring a goal? (If you haven’t, just look at the cover photo). It is the most blissful expression of pure relief. I hope we see it fifty times this season and fifty more during the playoffs.

Roope Hintz: “I’m captivated by you … like a firework show” Sparks Fly

Hintz is one of those players you tell people to watch even if they know nothing about hockey. Flashy goal celebrations, powerful speeding down the ice, and blonde billowing locks craft a captivating spectacle.

Joe Pavelski: “Time breaks down your mind and body, don’t you let it touch your soul” Timeless

Pavelski’s career begs the question if time even has a hold on him. His play certainly doesn’t seem affected. But even Captain America will have to stop at some point. This team needs to Do The Thing for him before he does.

Jamie Benn: “Used to chant my name, now they’re screaming that they hate me” Castles Crumbling

This offseason has had some loud voices demanding Benn be stripped of the captaincy. As ludicrous as that idea is, not to mention potentially disastrous for the locker room, his warranted and foolish suspension in the playoffs left a bad feeling among many fans. Hopefully the “Bennaisance” continues instead of more poorly thought-out hits this season.

Tyler Seguin: “And it’s delicate but I will do my best to seem bulletproof” Foolish One

Seguin has faced criticism throughout his career for varying reasons. Even after coming back from major surgery, there have been people wanting to trade him. Despite that, he has shown flashes of vintage Seguin, especially under DeBoer’s coaching. It has been a steady process, but he has still shown he needs to be here.

Wyatt Johnston: “Don’t you think nineteen’s too young” Dear John

He’s not 19 anymore. He’s a 20-year-old teenager who knows how to cut an onion after Mrs. Pavelski showed him. Oh, and he’s become a more confident hockey player.

Evgenii Dadonov: “This is surely not what you thought it would be” Speak Now

That’s a good thing. In these past playoffs, he had 10 points in 16 games and the way he’s fit into the lineup has been a pleasant surprise. The Stars are shaping up to have a solid amount of forward depth and he’s a key part of that.

Mason Marchment: “The battle’s in your hands now” The Story of Us

Marchment started his season with Dallas more strong but that tapered off. Similarly in the playoffs he had a stronger series against Calgary but struggled to find his way onto the scoresheet afterward. He’s had a full season with this team now and it’s up to him to figure out how to be effective.

Ty Dellandrea: “There is nothing I do better than revenge” Better Than Revenge

He has a certain feral but successful quality that fits Better Than Revenge so well. The most recent example is when he went on a tear and scored back-to-back goals to force Game 6 and get Benn back in the lineup.

Radek Faksa: “You and I walk a fragile line” Haunted

Faksa’s usage under Bowness made him a villain. Faksa’s usage under DeBoer made him a defensive pillar these past playoffs. It’s a fragile balance there.

Dallas Stars Defensemen

Miro Heiskanen: “You are the best thing that’s ever been mine” Mine

No complaints. The Stars would be hopeless without him. He got hurt for half a game in the series against Seattle and everything fell apart. Heiskanen will do the most effortless defending you will ever see while playing thirty minutes a night.

Ryan Suter: “Now go stand in the corner and think about what you did” Better Than Revenge

They should have bought him out. I don’t want to count how many times his mistakes in the playoffs led to a goal because it’s summer and nobody needs to relive that.

Thomas Harley: “It’s best if we move fast and keep quiet” I Can See You

Harley brings a boost of fast offensive energy from the blue line that was lacking since John Klingberg left. It’s a good support to Heiskanen as well.

Esa Lindell: “It turns out freedom ain’t nothing but missing you” Back to December

Speaking of Klingberg, I miss the pairing of him and Lindell. Other combinations with Lindell, particularly with Hakanpaa, have had their issues. Maybe a new season with new pairings could be a welcome turnaround for him.

Jani Hakanpaa: “You have pointed out my flaws again, as if I don’t already see them” Mean

His flaw is that he takes too many penalties. Everyone knows he takes too many penalties. Please stop taking so many penalties.

Nils Lundkvist: “This is me praying that, this was the very first page, not where the storyline ends” Enchanted

I’m just a girl standing in front of Pete DeBoer asking him to give Nils Lundkvist a chance. The Stars traded a first-round pick for him, but he only played in 60 regular season games and didn’t even touch playoff ice. He has potential and needs to be given a proper opportunity to prove himself.

Joel Hanley: “I’ll be right here on the ground” Superman

He’s a good 7th defenseman on the team and reliable whenever he steps in. He re-signed for two more years of that dependability.

Dallas Stars The Kids

Mavrik Bourque: “I won’t let nobody hurt you” Never Grow Up

This team becomes ferocious when it comes to defending their rookies. We should hopefully see him this season as of the Stars’ top prospects.

Logan Stankoven: “I’m shining like fireworks over your sad empty town” Dear John

Any time the Stars had a bad stretch, fans would point to Stankoven’s imminent arrival to the NHL as a shining beacon of hope. Now it seems like that time has come and it couldn’t be more exciting.

Dallas Stars New Players

Matt Duchene: “I’ve been left in the rain lost and pining” Electric Touch

He has demanded a trade from Colorado and gotten yanked out of the middle of a game, gotten bought out by Nashville, and tossed around other teams. Reasons aside, Duchene has had a tumultuous journey around the NHL. Maybe Dallas will be different for him.

Craig Smith: “Just the first time ever hanging out with you” Electric Touch

Coming from the Capitals, he should add some extra depth to the forwards and could potentially be the 13th forward on the roster — especially once the kids get going.

Sam Steel: “You’ll have new Septembers” Innocent

He is new and training camp starts in September. I hope I will have more to say about him by the next album release. But more forward depth is a good thing and speaks to this team’s caliber.

Dallas Stars Goalies

Jake Oettinger: “(He’s) the kind of book that you can’t put down” When Emma Falls in Love

He’s the kind of goalie you hope is a Dallas Star forever. Last season was Oettinger’s first full season in the NHL. With some proper load management and more experience, he’ll still steal games the way we’ve seen him capable of doing.

Scott Wedgewood: “Your string of lights is still bright to me” Innocent

He should be given more games during the regular season so Oettinger can be fresher by the time playoffs start. Despite having a tough time mopping up some messes in the playoffs, Wedgewood has proven he’s a good and capable backup goalie.

I hope this was a fun rundown of the Stars’ roster. I can’t wait till they’re back in October.